Current mood:

anxious

I must be insane
Can I really do this? I am auditioning for Shady Shakes' shows this year again but I just don't know. Because although they are summer shows, the last month of school and the first month of rehearsals coincide. Which means I will have work, school, and rehearsal at the same time. But I do really miss theatre. But I really really have to finish off strong in this class. It is the only one of the three math classes where the grade actually counts (college transferable).

But I know myself, if I don't audition, I will seriously be kicking myself as I watch the shows this summer and grumble about them. Isn't that fucked up? It is really hard for me to watch theatre without mentally putting myself on stage. What a fucking ego. I think a lot of it is because Shady is still about 50% "friends doing Shakespeare." Better than the 100% it started with, but still. The flip side of that is maybe that's why I keep getting parts with Shady Shakes.

I do already have monologues picked out and memorized and an audition type reserved. It would be seriously ridiculous to not at least audition.

Anyway, not sure what I want as a response, but I don't know... a little encouragement I guess. This really seems to be dragging me down and it should be picking my energy up